Grief: after losing someone close · worksheet 146
When someone goes, what they used to do also disappears: the paperwork, the cooking, the phone calls, the shared decisions. Adjusting to this new daily life is part of grief. You don’t have to do everything alone, or all at once.
Before you start
- What it is for: To gradually take back your daily life, without carrying everything on your own.
- About 20 minutes, when you feel ready.
- You don’t have to do everything or do it now.
- Avoid big decisions (selling, moving house) too soon.
Prefer paper? Download the PDF to print (with a page for psychologists).
What to do with your results
Every small task you take back counts. Also notice what you can do today that you couldn’t before.
If you find it hard
If a task brings back the longing too strongly, hand it over for now or do it with someone. No big decisions too soon.
For psychologists
The PDF also includes a page for the psychologist: how to run the exercise in session, points to watch and scientific references. You are free to use it with your clients.
For psychologists: aim, audience and duration
Work on the “restoration” side of grief: identify the tasks and roles the person who died used to have, what needs to be learnt, delegated or given up, and the help available.
Widowhood, loss of a parent or partner who handled a large part of daily life (paperwork, money, cooking, children, the car…). Duration: 20 min.
References
Worden, J. W. (2018). Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy: A Handbook for the Mental Health Practitioner (5th ed.). Springer.
Stroebe, M. & Schut, H. (2010). The dual process model of coping with bereavement: A decade on. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 61(4), 273-289.
These worksheets do not replace therapy. If you are in distress or having suicidal thoughts, call your local emergency number (112 in Europe; 3114 in France, free, 24/7).
Free worksheet for non-commercial use: you may share it with credit to the author, without modifying it (Creative Commons BY-NC-ND 4.0 licence).
