Well-being and positive psychology (PERMA) · worksheet 108
Think of someone who helped you, supported you or taught you something important, and whom you have never really thanked. Writing in detail about what they did strengthens the bond and does you both good.
Before you start
- What it is for: To express your gratitude concretely, which strengthens the bond and pleasant emotions for several days.
- About 20-30 minutes, at a quiet time.
- It can be someone close or someone from years ago: a teacher, a neighbour, a former boss.
- You don’t have to give it to them: writing it already has an effect. If you decide to give it, reading it in person is often very moving.
Prefer paper? Download the PDF to print (with a page for psychologists).
What to do with your results
Notice what you felt while writing: often warmth, sometimes emotion or a little sadness. It is all normal.
If you find it hard
If you don’t know whom to write to, think of a teacher, a neighbour, a former colleague. If the person is no longer here, you can still write to them.
For psychologists
The PDF also includes a page for the psychologist: how to run the exercise in session, points to watch and scientific references. You are free to use it with your clients.
For psychologists: aim, audience and duration
Express concrete gratitude towards a person who has mattered, which strengthens the bond and positive emotions.
Isolation, distant relationships, grief (unsent letter), mild low mood. Duration: 20-30 min to write it; giving it is optional.
References
Seligman, M. E. P., Steen, T. A., Park, N. & Peterson, C. (2005). Positive psychology progress: Empirical validation of interventions. American Psychologist, 60(5), 410-421.
Dickens, L. R. (2017). Using gratitude to promote positive change: A series of meta-analyses investigating the effectiveness of gratitude interventions. Basic and Applied Social Psychology, 39(4), 193-208.
These worksheets do not replace therapy. If you are in distress or having suicidal thoughts, call your local emergency number (112 in Europe; 3114 in France, free, 24/7).
Free worksheet for non-commercial use: you may share it with credit to the author, without modifying it (Creative Commons BY-NC-ND 4.0 licence).
