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My network here and there

Mapping social support in two countries

Living abroad: building a life here · worksheet 49

When you live far away, the people who matter are often in another country. They are still important, but you also need support here, day to day. Take stock of your network, on both sides.

Before you start

  • What it is for: To see your support network here and there clearly, and what you are missing where you live.
  • About 15 minutes.
  • Far from home, your support network changes: some people are still there, others appear here. Seeing it written down helps you know what to look after and what to build.
  • The list doesn’t need to be long: quality counts, not numbers.

Prefer paper? Download the PDF to print (with a page for psychologists).

What to do with your results

Identify the type of support most lacking here (often practical help or physical presence): that is where your small social step will have the most effect.

If you find it hard

Building connections takes time. Start with regular activities (classes, an association, sport): bonds grow out of repetition.

For psychologists

The PDF also includes a page for the psychologist: how to run the exercise in session, points to watch and scientific references. You are free to use it with your clients.

For psychologists: aim, audience and duration
Help the person visualise their support network in their country of origin and in their host country, spot what is missing (often everyday, in-person support) and plan small steps to fill the gap.
Loneliness, isolation after settling in, accompanying partners, international students. Duration: 20 min in session.

References
Ward, C., Bochner, S. & Furnham, A. (2001). The Psychology of Culture Shock (2nd ed.). Routledge.
Bhugra, D. & Becker, M. A. (2005). Migration, cultural bereavement and cultural identity. World Psychiatry, 4(1), 18-24.

These worksheets do not replace therapy. If you are in distress or having suicidal thoughts, call your local emergency number (112 in Europe; 3114 in France, free, 24/7).

Free worksheet for non-commercial use: you may share it with credit to the author, without modifying it (Creative Commons BY-NC-ND 4.0 licence).

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Gonzalo Garzo, clinical psychologist

Gonzalo Garzo, clinical psychologist

A psychologist since 2018, I work with people online (in English, French or Spanish) and at my practice in La Rochelle, using third-wave CBT and EMDR. These worksheets help you move forward; if you need support, the first contact (20 min) is free.